The last couple of days have been somewhat of a roller coaster for me. Two days ago, my father who will soon be 79 years old, had a heart attack. Since then, he has gone through a battery of tests and procedures to discover that not only will he have to endure open heart surgery for a triple by-pass surgery, but he will also have to have a pacemaker installed to keep his heart in rhythm and beating as it should. For many of you reading this blog, you have walked through similar situations and can completely relate. A lot of you may be like I was prior to this incident, I have not walked through an issue like this with somebody on my side of the family; so this is a first for many of the emotions I have experienced.
My father and I have not always seen eye to eye, and have not always gotten along through the years (especially when I was younger and living at home). As I have gotten older, I have come to appreciate the fatherly efforts that he put into raising his children. He may not have approached life the same way that I do, but in his own way, he loved his family and did all that he could to provide a secure future for us. Looking back, I can see the sacrifices that he made so that we could "have a life". It may not have been the life that I personally would have chosen as a teenager, but we don't get to choose the circumstances that we grow up in. Notwithstanding, I can say with certainty that my father loved and gave in his own way.
It's been amazing to me to experience the rush of emotions when you get news about one of your parents, or somebody that you deeply love. All of a sudden, the trivial issues that you may have ever struggled with are inconsequential. Why is that? I believe that all of us make mistakes, hurt other people and do things that we regret, but the bottom line is that we are family! The most important things in life are not "things" at all, but those that we love. I am so thankful that I can look at my life and that I learned to mend fences along the way with my father. Throughout the last couple of days, I have had the chance to do an inventory on how I treated and responded to my father and I'm glad that I have loved and respected him and honored him for who he is and what he has done for his family.
Tomorrow, I will pack up my family and head to North Carolina to be with him during his surgery. I am fully expecting him to come through this with "flying colors" and to watch him live out a full life. He can be a little testy at times, a little hardheaded and definitely set in his ways, but he's my dad and I love him. I can look at my own life and see the impact that he has made on me. The strong work ethic that I carry is because of my dad...the sense of fairness in dealing with people, regardless of their ethnicity comes from my dad and the "I'm gonna make this work, no matter what" attitude is most definitely a trait that I gleaned from him. He is a man that has endured hardships, a rough upbringing and has learned how to overcome odds throughout the years. When it's all said and done and I'm as old as he is now, I want to look back over my life and be able to say that it wasn't my money, my stuff, my goals or even my ministry that was most important to me. I want to live by a standard that puts my wife, my kids, my family and my friends first. When, as an old man; I "go the way of the earth" as all men do, I want to have lived my life in such a way that my family will experience the same emotions that I have by getting this news of a man that I love deeply...I call him Dad.
2 comments:
I went through with my Mom in 2002 in October a similar ordeal. She had a heart attack and had to have a quadupal bypass. You are right, with all of the difference we have with our loved ones,it is errased, all of the hard feelings etc. To have them with you at least one more day is a priviledge. Two years later she had to have a pacemaker. It is such a rollercoaster ride but I could not have had it any other way but to be by her side and help in any way I could. I will pray for your family because I know God will be right there. I miss seeing you guys and hope to see you soon. God bless.
What a wonderful way to share your journey through this time of hardship that your walking through with your dad and his surgery. We are praying with you and trust that he will be just fine and even better than before. The past two years have been a rollercoaster for our family as well, when I had brain surgery and our family had to walk through it with me and then watch me get worse and not better, it certainly brings out a wide range of emotions and allows you to forget about any trival issues you may have had in the past. Your right we are family and the ties that bind pull us all together in times of need, and going to our Father is all that matters during those times. We are holding you guys up during this time and we love you very much! We are standing in the gap for you and your dad!
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